|—||Unknown (via aukles)|
So yesterday I got bored so I made a Facebook account for an egg
And I friended a bunch of my friends and some strangers and posted some really dumb Facebook updates
And people started messaging me so I responded
And one person proposed to me
And then she blocked me so I made a status about it
Holy shell I need a life
why does an Egg have better social life than me
Can i pls have a popular post?
we’ll make this the popular post
This is so cute
Through sheer determination people are helping this person get a popular post
Lets help this chum, ok lads?
Reporting in, operation Dream Come True is a go
All know spells from Harry Potter
reblogging this for future reference.
There are several missing from this. Sectumsempra, for example.
this mother fucker is the voice of nemo
shit i think i want to fuck nemo
I’d touch his butt.
Does money make you mean? In a talk at TEDxMarin, social psychologist Paul Piff shares his research into how people behave when they feel wealthy. (Hint: badly.)
the saddest thing is seeing a post where someone got something wrong on accident and clicking on their blog only to find that they’ve either been bullied off or are getting 100+ violent and hateful anons
like thank you tumblr you’re the gosh darn fucking best
WAKE UP AMERICA
"if you’re straight then why did you say she was hot"
yo i’m straight not blind
One time a nun at my school saw a hot guy and said “woah God did a nice job on that one” and we all looked at her like ??? and she goes “I’m allowed to look at the menu I just can’t order”
Reblogging for Haymitch.
I’m pretty sure the Gale reaction is the most accurate.
I’m not doing it
*piano goes on*
I’m not doing it goddammit
Fuck you if you think it’ll hapJUST A SMALL TOWN GURL
sometimes i forget that dogs are animals descended from scary ass wild beasts that hunt and kill and shit like
my pug just farted so loud she scared herself and had to be cuddled until she stopped crying like how did this happen